This is a little bit of a random post, but my heart has been so heavy for a dear friend of mine, and I wanted to share it with you… and ask you to pray and be thankful for the little blessings in life that we so easily take for granted.

So, let me introduce you to my friend, Lauren. We met at Penn State, and sadly she transfered to UVA… but we have stayed in touch along the way. She is holding a pretty little lady named, Charlotte. Charlotte is 4 months old, and the last time that I saw Lauren she shared the news that she was pregnant with her 3rd kiddo (Charlotte). Hard to believe how fast time goes. Lauren came up to visit for the day with her 2 other kiddos and we went to the Baltimore Aquarium before she moved to Arizona with her family.

Anyways, the reason that I am sharing this with you is b/c Lauren has always been an amazing woman, and her strength encourages me so incredibly much. Just typing her story now makes me cry… 

Sweet little Charlotte was diagnosed with a rare brain and spinal cord tumor, which the doctors suspect had been growing since she was in the womb. Lauren and her family spent a great deal of time at the hospital… having tests done, waiting on results, etc.

When they received the prognosis… this was Lauren’s message:

“For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them. How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them! If I would count them, they are more than the sand.” Psalm 139:13-18

We met with another oncologist on Friday. Though we still do not have a name for the tumor, it is terminal. Due to its very nature, that it is indistinguishable from the brain stem and spinal cord, it can be neither removed nor radiated. Chemo is not a viable option, either. Though we had a bit of hope for a different outcome, this prognosis did not surprise us.

I (Lauren) had many good cries throughout our week in the hospital, during which Charlotte would send me looks as if to say, “What is wrong with you, Mama?!” So by God’s grace, I am now JOYFULLY accepting each day with ALL my babies as grace, and I try to just shower Charlotte (and Elyse and Henry, too) with love and laughter. There will be plenty of time to mourn; for now, I will ENJOY my sweet baby and fill her days with gladness! Speaking of days, we really have no idea how long to expect with her. The doctors do not say, as they do not know how fast-growing the tumor is. Besides, none of us is God; He alone has numbered her days and ours. Though when I think of that day approaching, a day all mothers fear and hope never comes to them, I am reminded of a great truth that I had been meditating on during the Lenten season, before we ever learned of the Pretty Lady’s condition. I rediscovered a wonderful, modern hymn (http://www.gettymusic.com/hymns-powerofthecross.aspx) that reminds me that while there will be many dark days in this world, the darkest day of all (“Christ on the road to Calvary”) is already passed. And dark as it was, it was followed by a gloriously bright, “Resurrection Sunday”! So I’ve been focusing on the truth of the resurrection of the dead. “For if the dead are not raised, not even Christ has been raised. And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile and you are still in your sins. Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ have perished. If in this life only we have hoped in Christ, we are of all people most to be pitied. But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead [!]” I Corinthians 15:16-20. “Death is crushed to death.” Fatal tumors do not have the final say – HOORAY!

We still need and appreciate all your prayers.

Because He really HAS sent the Comforter,
Lauren

P.S. If you live here in southern Arizona with us, please be sensitive when speaking in front of our children. They know that Charlotte has been in the hospital and goes to see many doctors, that she is not feeling well and “has bad stuff growing inside of her.” But we do not want to burden them unnecessarily with thoughts of her death. We will prepare them when her decline becomes obvious.

I just had to share her story because I can’t even imagine going through what her family is going through… and I just don’t know if I could be that strong.

Lauren has inspired and encouraged me so much. I am so thankful for Ainsley, and that she is a healthy baby. Reading her email makes me realize I need to be thankful everyday… for the little things, and to live each moment like its my last.. and to never give up hope for a miracle.

m.e.

Follow us on Facebook

Follow us on Twitter